Before you plant a New Year’s kiss on someone, learn the origins of this popular tradition
Why Do We Kiss at Midnight on New Year’s Eve?
Updated on Dec. 16, 2024
Ah, the iconic New Year’s kiss! It’s as much a part of ringing in the new year as making resolutions or watching the ball drop. But have you ever wondered where this New Year’s tradition came from, what it really means and if it’s still a thing today?
Whether you’re gearing up for your first New Year’s kiss or hoping for a memorable smooch to welcome 2025, we’ve got all the info you’ll need. We spoke with relationship expert Laurel House, along with folklore gurus and English professors Christina Fitzgerald and Daniel Compora, to uncover the fascinating history behind this timeless tradition. We also included advice from etiquette expert Diane Gottsman on how to build up to your very own memorable New Year’s kiss.
So get ready to lock lips with your special someone (or share a quick peck with a friend) when the clock strikes midnight, because 2025 is going to start off with a bang … and maybe a little romance too!
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What is the origin of the New Year’s kiss?
Though the precise origins of puckering up the second a new year begins are unknown, the custom is often traced back to two winter festivals: Saturnalia, a pagan holiday in ancient Rome, and Hogmanay, a Viking tradition still celebrated on New Year’s in Scotland. Saturnalia was held annually during the winter solstice, and because it was the biggest party of the year, naturally it involved public drunkenness. Somehow that part morphed into the (likely correct) assumption that kissing was involved. Because Saturnalia was held between Dec. 17 and Dec. 23, experts believe that’s how the New Year’s kiss got its start. Hogmanay traditions, on the other hand, at least involve a New Year’s kiss. But these kisses were doled out to greet strangers and friends along with wishes of a “Guid New Year.”
According to Fitzgerald, one of the earliest literary mentions of a New Year’s kiss (if not the first) goes back to the Middle Ages, specifically Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. One passage takes place on New Year’s Day and refers to a holiday game in which the ladies who lose must give something to the men (and suggests that they do so happily). Meanwhile, the male winners are “not angry” about this rule—an “ironic understatement,” Fitzgerald tells Reader’s Digest. “Every glossed edition and commentary I’ve seen on this assumes the ‘something’ is a kiss.”
What does a New Year’s kiss mean?
Apart from following customs with murky origins, what’s the reasoning behind giving someone a New Year’s kiss? This kiss is part of both English and German folklore, which “indicate that whoever a person is with at midnight portends what type of luck they will have for the rest of the year,” says Compora.
How did the New Year’s kiss make its way to America?
German immigrants likely brought this aspect of their folklore to the United States, according to Compora. Though it’s unclear when, exactly, that took place, a New York Times article from Jan. 3, 1893, is thought to be the first documentation of the annual custom. Or is it a tradition? Or a superstition?
Whether a New Year’s kiss falls under the category of “tradition” or “superstition” depends on the kissers’ viewpoints. “Superstitions usually imply some element of cause and effect,” Compora tells Reader’s Digest. “If people truly believed that kissing someone could prevent a year of loneliness, it would constitute superstitious behavior.” But, he says, in more modern times, a New Year’s kiss would be most accurately considered a tradition, given that it’s a custom “passed down generationally and practiced widely within a society” and not a belief that one action will result in another.
“Quite honestly,” Compora says, “it sounds like an excuse to kiss people who may not otherwise allow you to do so.”
An important note about that kiss
Compora’s comments bring up an important point about a New Year’s kiss: It should be consensual. (So should any kiss, for that matter!) A new calendar year does not give anyone kissing carte blanche. No matter how much you want or think you deserve good luck in the new year, that’s never a valid reason to make another person feel uncomfortable.
How do you build up to a New Year’s kiss?
To figure out if a kiss will be welcome or not, you need to pay attention to the other person’s body language. “Without being forward, you can smile, be engaging, make eye contact and lean slightly forward when the other person is coming in for a potential kiss,” Gottsman says. “Don’t pucker up prematurely.”
It’s also a good sign if the person you want to kiss has already accepted a date with you. Gottsman also suggests this tactic: “You can jokingly say, ‘Want to shake, hug or kiss?’ if you have been talking and casually seeing each other but haven’t gotten to the first kiss.”
How should you decline a New Year’s kiss?
Other than a polite or stern no, Gottsman recommends reaching out with your arms to simulate a hug. “Put both hands out to grasp hands (not a handshake) rather than a kiss,” she says. And if you’re open to a kiss, just not one on the lips, try turning your head for a cheek kiss, she suggests, “keeping a friendly expression but not making face-to-face, eye-to-eye or lip-to-lip contact.”
Another important note: Make sure you aren’t sending mixed signals. If you’re not interested in anything romantic, says Gottsman, “let the person know when you accept the date that you are going as friends. Or saying, ‘Too soon for a kiss!’ in a lighthearted tone of voice can diffuse an awkward moment.”
How long should a New Year’s kiss last?
This one is best left to your judgment, based on your situation. After all, what’s acceptable for a New Year’s kiss will be different for a long-term couple than it is for a pair of strangers. It also depends on whether you’re attending a low-key celebration with family at home or partying at a bar all night long. But, in general, here’s a good guideline: A kiss should last for as long or as short as is enjoyable for both parties—and appropriate for both the relationship and the setting.
According to eharmony relationship expert Laurel House, “the point of the kiss is about making connections—both physical and emotional. [For a couple], the kiss at midnight is said to strengthen that bond, which is where the superstition comes in. If a couple doesn’t kiss at midnight, people believe that their bond is not as strong and could fail in the year to come.”
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At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. For this piece on the New Year’s kiss, Elizabeth Yuko, PhD, tapped her experience as a longtime journalist, researcher and bioethicist. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
Sources:
- Diane Gottsman, etiquette expert and owner of the Protocol School of Texas; email interview, Dec. 11, 2024
- Christina Fitzgerald, PhD, professor of English literature at the University of Toledo; email interview, 2021
- Daniel Compora, PhD, associate professor of English Language and Literature at the University of Toledo; email interview, 2021
- Laurel House, relationship expert for eharmony and host of The Man Whisperer podcast; email interview, 2021
- World History Encyclopedia: “Saturnalia”
- Scotland.org: “Ten Things You Might Not Know About Hogmanay”
